I bumped into an old school friend today. He started showing off, talking about his well paid job and expensive sports car.
Then he pulled out a photo of his wife and said, "She's beautiful, isn't she?"
I said, "If you think she's gorgeous, you should see my girlfriend."
He said, "Why? Is she a stunner?"
I said, "No, she's a fu**ing optician."
Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and then gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 10 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."
Man:"Why did you make women so beautiful?" God:"So you would love her." Man:"Then why did you make her so dumb?" God:"So she would love you."
You're either on a roll.....or you're taking shit from some asshole.
I lost my case.